Sunday, January 06, 2008

Of white monkeys and brown racists

India just lost the second Test at SCG a few minutes ago, and since then there has been a steady debate on all the TV 'news' channels. The whole country seems to be immersed in this imbroglio. On how our country was cheated by the twelfth Australian 'player' Steve Bucknor, who strangely seems to favor the white skinned Australians over us brown Indians. Why is it strange ? because Steve Bucknor is as black as they come and I feel that he would feel closer to us 'brownies' than to the Caucasians. Maybe he feels that way due to that particular day in 1983 when...

I am faced with a dilemma of my own. On one hand I am elated that the Indian team lost. Why am I elated ? The Indian team by no means is the best in the world, Sachin with his insistence at failing miserably in matches which matter, or dravid with his pusillanimous Captaincy, etc... our team is a paper tiger and a good one a that, then why do they get so much fucking money ?

BCCI Bigshot:'Oh! look people, here is our beloved Indian cricket team, they got fucked in the first round of the World Cup, boo hoo, let's give them even more money and cheer them up, poor souls'
BCCI Bigshot's secretary:'But sir, we live in a country where people even today die from hunger\cold\dehydration and many people don't get a decent meal everyday!'
BCCI Bigshot:'Nonsense, we have a national duty to perform, we have to make the cricketers feel like gods, lest they fail miserably again, let us give them tax breaks on the new snazzy cars that they buy, and make it up by passing it on to the average Indian hard working schmuck who by now has gotten used to being ass fucked and won't feel a thing. After all, all you need to keep the schmuck happy is some cricket, a few mms scandals, and the hopes of a solution to the traffic problem and that's that.'

So when they lose like morons, and get humiliated, I feel that at least then, they redeem themselves and the Crores of rupees they earn. Now, there: is great all-round entertainment.

But.

Another aspect to this situation is my belief in the equality of man, what is being done is unfair. I am not a big cricket fan anymore, but I was appalled at the decisions taken by Steve Bucknor as Umpire, they were wrong and clearly fueled by malice. Bucknor is known to take time in giving his decisions, however that aspect of his umpiring was missing, a fact I find suspicious. The world (sigh)! If only it were perfect.

'Only one team played in the spirit of the game' - Anil Kumble
I am happy to see one of the 'boys' speak a sentence in coherent and concise English because usually... bah! To hell with this shit, I want a girlfriend(Could you lend me one, please ?)

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Listening to 303 - Kula Shaker

' Oi! cock up and fuck off' - SiegerKranz Meer to some chick on the road.

6 comments:

Violet said...

Haha you want a girlfriend???

Nothing wrong with that but it was just out of the blue….now I want a boyfriend too :)

HelterSkelter said...

yeah, I guess I do.
It is lame isn't it ? Well I guess that is what lame people(like me) do: Do Lame things.
Ha Aha ahaha (diabolical laughter)! I used lame 4 times.

You don't have a Boyfriend ? I don't believe that, how does that fit into the 'grand scheme' of things ?

Oh wait, I feel my blogger testicles tingling, I feel like writing a new post. Got to go, take care.

Violet said...

It does, it does fit. In fact it’s what keeps me happy and carefree. No hassles you see. Its just that sometimes bloggers like you make me feel like I should have one :)

HelterSkelter said...

Wow, I am flaterred.
I am really bad with people, I wish I were autistic , at least then I would have had an excuse. So I hope you meant that as a compliment, wait I am rambling. Sorry.

Apparently, You and I are on my blog at the same time.

Anonymous said...

interesting ....happy 2008 ....not much of net at home..flyin on 12th..tk cr - ravi

HelterSkelter said...

hehe, best of luck Ravi.
Have fun.
Don't ever let your life get boring.