Tuesday, May 06, 2008

mirror, mirror on the wall.

I am a boon to women everywhere

Never did I think that I would ever say such a sentence, much less put it up on my blog for it to be preserved for posterity.(unless the google guys decide to delete this stuff)

Now, as I am me, and am prone to idiosyncrasies, I shall proceed to demonstrate this quality by qualifying the above statement, (lest I give off the wrong signals.)

I am a boon to all women, who are unsure of their looks, everywhere

More accurate but lamer. (I choose to eat the cake)

How ? is it so ?

Now if you are a chick and unsure as to whether you are pretty or not, and are too scared to ask someone else directly or fear that you might get a disingenuous answer, all you need to do is strike up a conversation with your's truly: Me :)

That is step 1, step 2 is where you actually find out that which you sought while initiating the conversation in the first place, so listen carefully now, this is a bit tricky, the more I stutter and stammer, and make a complete fool of myself and my intelligence, probably even forgetting the basic rules of English syntax and making no sense semantically either, while speaking to you, the prettier you are, now this is a 'rating' without a standard to measure against, and for this purpose you should bring along a friend too, and notice my speech when I try speaking to her.
If I stammered more when I spoke to you, then you have definitive proof that you are prettier if not, too bad, you should have chosen someone else to bring along.

Why would this be unbiased ? because my reaction, here, is natural and not controlled by my conscious mind, that scheming villain! So there you go; happy divining.

Addendum: And, if I run away from you, then you might safely assume that you are that ugly duckling, all grown up.


Anonymous said...

that's y gals don't come to u ; )

Anonymous said...

oh another reason d cab incident..hahaha

JerryKantrell said...

yes, I seem to have found out the problem afflicting me, unfortunately the solution is apparently non-existent :(
Yeah, about the Cab incident, I wanted to strangle that chick, even mild-mannered Sandy was of the same opinion :D